And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
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