I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.