Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
