she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Swine flu. Run for my life!
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
My bed smells like the plague
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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