My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
I want to fling myself into the sun
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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