Me too!
Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
Randomize