it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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