is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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