guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
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