Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
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