Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
