she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
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