Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
