Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
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