and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
Edward fifth and chaser hands
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
The chlamydia really affected his face.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
Randomize
