If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
should my penis look like a turkey
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
