At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
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