and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
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