STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
he high fived his dick after we had sex
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize