Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Randomize