he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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