apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Just high enough for therapy.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
