I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Randomize