kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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