we have officially lost it.
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
Randomize
