it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
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