I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize