i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Randomize
