chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Randomize
