Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Randomize
