Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
i drank out of a bidet.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Randomize
