So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
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