Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Randomize
