I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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