Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
We just shotgunned beers for America
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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