my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
