I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
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