The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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