make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Panties = found
Randomize
