She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
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