Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
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