2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
Randomize
