I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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