I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
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