Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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