Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.