Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
