My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Randomize