yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
Randomize
