Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Randomize