Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Randomize
