Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
